Ok just for some background to give everyone a perspective, im 19 my little brother is 16. I never experimented with pot/pills or anything of the sort even though alot of my friends have/do. I have never seen any goals accomplished by it, or any gaines from it. Now, my brother and all of his little friends I am guessing they think its "cool" to get high and all of that. Now my mom found out but even with her taking everything away from him I doubt it will actually stop the problem. I dont want to be a complete ass to my brother because usually siblings look up to each other and dont rat each other out but I am just looking out for his best interest and his future. Any thoughts or ideas on how I should approach the situation and try to help but now seem like I am completely against my brother?
thanks guys (and girls) for any responses

 

You can't be worried about being his friend. Be his big brother first and do what you gotta do.

 

Well I know that much, its just hard to do what needs to be done first, when I feel like if I do that he will never trust me again or let me get close to him.

 

I didn't say rat him out to your mom. Sit him down and talk to him. Leave those drug pamphlets in his bookbag. Point out some of the stupid things he and his friends are doing while high. So on and so forth. Is he a follower or a leader?

 

If he looks up to you at all, he'll trust your opinion. It would have been good to let it be know ahead of time that you think it's stupid. You've been there in the position and never seen the positive effects.

I've know friends who have been killed by 'friends' over drugs. It's unbelievable, yet so true. I've had friends blow their brains out because they were stupid and on something at the time, and just so happened to be playing with a gun. Whether by accident or through betrayal, it's not worth the consequences.

My sister knows my stance on some situations... and she knows I'll beat her arse if I catch her doing stuff again. Unless he's a COMPLETE idiot, he'll look up to you for it, whether now or in the future when he realizes you were right. You can't force him to stop, he'll still find ways to do it if he's going to, but at least let him know how you feel about it. I'd beat him up and show him how stupid he is.

 

Well I used to think a leader, but im guessing more of a follower, just because his friends do it and other people so if he does it, he will feel cool, which he sells personal stuff for money then buys stuff then after everything is said and done he has nothing and has not gained anything. And he doesnt really do the talking one on one thing very well and is very to himself, not an open type of person.

EDIT: lmao ^^ beat him up. Ya I am just afraid to push him away you know. And trust me I have had friends die from stuff like this also and I dont want to lose my little brother.

 

Disclaimer: I have very carefully worded the following as to not get warning, bans, or offend anyone. If i have voilated these please by all means delete this post.

Drugs never got me anywhere really. They were only little wins, but it was a loss in the bigger picture. I think a lot of the youth, especially in your brothers age range, really do do things like that because they are trying to look bigger than they are. But i don't want to say that so generally as to offend someone.
Its hard to make an argument to a user by attacking the situation with a negative and vague outlook like, "Its bad and dangerous, etc." I think you have to give him really life lessons. If you havent been involved then these activities it may especially hard. But there really are so many hazards that come w getting and using drugs, that it truely can outweigh the benefits.
I remember when I was younger, i heard, "Marijuana is the gateway drug." And I never really understand exactly what that meant in that just being around it will expose you to other things soo much more dangerous. Looking back, I wish that it could have been explained more clearly to me exactly what the schools and everything meant by this, instead of simply maknig the statement. Be very thorough and explain it in terms that he will understand, but at the same time make yourself be a piositive example, in order to establish your credibility. I don't think being harsh is really going to get you anywhere. And let him know that he has disapointed you at the same. It will be a tough juggling act to do all these, but hopefully it all works itself out. Its going to take him time to process everything, and peer pressure is a very hard thing to conquer, especially at 16.

 

thank you for that Adam ^^ I apprecieate that. Being able to come foward like that express an actual experience helps me understand how to approach it a little bit more. Its just him and I are opposite I never seen the use for drugs and I guess he does, I have heard its a good feeling and all but I dont think that it is worth going to jail over or anything like that. How should I go about starting the conversation?

 

you just have to talk to him. Im not sure how close you guys are but hopefully he will respect your opinion and try to turn things around. Be happy you kind of caught it early and could have a chance to stop it before he gets hurt or in serious trouble.

 

Just take the oportunity when it presents itself. Be sure there is time available.
Everything is more important than doing drugs. I quit when my baby was born and when i got a real job/career. Suddenly my priorities have straightened themselves out, and your brother may just need to have his priorities laid out, and have consequences explained to him.
Im sure you'll work it out w him.