Disappearing For A While
#1
I've been going through some tough times lately with my girl of almost 5 years and it's taking a toll on me lately. Haven't been eating much but at least I'm sleeping and I don't really have much of a desire to be online anymore right now. Guess this is what they call depression. I'll take care of my last f/s item and then you all may not here from me for a while. Just didn't want to leave you without saying bye first. 02.gif Take care all and I'll be sure to let you know when I'm back on regularly.
#5
Not the end of the world or anything but maybe the end of our relationship.
I brought up the whole issue of separating b/c I feel like we don't treat each other like a couple, more like friends. We argue alot. I think we might still be together b/c were comfortable and it's to hard to let go.
We have been engaged for about 3 years now and living together almost the whole time. She wants to know when we are getting married and I don't know what to tell her b/c I am not ready yet. I don't want to just keep leading her on with the promise of marriage when I can't tell her when. We are only 24. When I asked her to marry me we were alot closer but over the years we've changed and drifted apart.
We have also said and done things in the past that we forgave each other for or overlooked but still hurt. There are positives but right now it seems like the negatives are out weighing them.
I don't want either of us getting hurt but either way I think it's going to end up hurting one way or another. Loneliness and emptiness are very painful but so is staying together for the wrong reasons.
I just don't know what to do! I don't want to lose her if she is the one for me but don't want to end up that old unhappy couple that sleeps in separate rooms and never say anything to each other and when they do it's nasty.
marriage is a forever thing and should not be taken lightly!
Any insight may be helpful but I know in the end this is a decision I will have to make on my own.
Thanks all, sorry to ramble on but it helps to get it out. Talk to everyone soon!
Bye, George
I brought up the whole issue of separating b/c I feel like we don't treat each other like a couple, more like friends. We argue alot. I think we might still be together b/c were comfortable and it's to hard to let go.
We have been engaged for about 3 years now and living together almost the whole time. She wants to know when we are getting married and I don't know what to tell her b/c I am not ready yet. I don't want to just keep leading her on with the promise of marriage when I can't tell her when. We are only 24. When I asked her to marry me we were alot closer but over the years we've changed and drifted apart.
We have also said and done things in the past that we forgave each other for or overlooked but still hurt. There are positives but right now it seems like the negatives are out weighing them.
I don't want either of us getting hurt but either way I think it's going to end up hurting one way or another. Loneliness and emptiness are very painful but so is staying together for the wrong reasons.
I just don't know what to do! I don't want to lose her if she is the one for me but don't want to end up that old unhappy couple that sleeps in separate rooms and never say anything to each other and when they do it's nasty.
marriage is a forever thing and should not be taken lightly!
Any insight may be helpful but I know in the end this is a decision I will have to make on my own.
Thanks all, sorry to ramble on but it helps to get it out. Talk to everyone soon!
Bye, George
#8
Senior Member
Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 34,642
Likes: 0
From: Los Lunas, New Mexico, USA.
Vehicle: 2001 Hyundai Tiburon, 2004 Kia Sorento, 2010 Kia Soul
Living together as a couple is the same as being married. Almost exactly.
Ask some folks that have been married for 30, 40, or 50 years. Were they always good? Hell no, they fought. Did they always sleep in the same bed? No, they didn't. Hell, some go live with their folks for awhile to work stuff out.
That's the key though, if you 2 are to be together, work it out. If not, learn from it man. Life isn't the easiest thing in the world, and no relationship is 100% perfect. Arguments happen, and sometimes more than others. It's how you handle them and work stuff out that shows who youa re.
Ask some folks that have been married for 30, 40, or 50 years. Were they always good? Hell no, they fought. Did they always sleep in the same bed? No, they didn't. Hell, some go live with their folks for awhile to work stuff out.
That's the key though, if you 2 are to be together, work it out. If not, learn from it man. Life isn't the easiest thing in the world, and no relationship is 100% perfect. Arguments happen, and sometimes more than others. It's how you handle them and work stuff out that shows who youa re.
#9
Yes, a relationship is a responsibility, it must be constantly worked on and nurtured. There will always be arguements but there will also be great times between you guys as well. Everybody is different and only you can answer your own question. When my wife asked me to marry her, it was the hardest decision of my life, I was 29 and had been dating her for over 2 years. Looking back, I know I made the right decision BUT my wife had just graduated from college and I had a career already. You got to ask yourself if you're financially and emotionally ready. Yes, finances are very important in a marriage it's the number 1 reason why people get divorced statistically speaking. Also, you guys are very young, are you ready for the sacrafices ahead?